Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Every field wears a bonnet/With some spring daisies on it/Even birds of a feather show their clothes off together

I like to compare myself to various UPS/FedEx delivery men I've encountered over the years . It's really only in one regard - I like to wear shorts to work. When I was at Big Espresso I was one of the few employees who regularly work shorts in warmer weather. I would have worn them even in the cold weather except that I usually had to walk at least a block or so from my parking space and I am a bit of wimp when it comes to being cold like that. But once it was spring, I'm sure weeks and weeks went past without me wearing trousers. And now that I'm at a job where I am often outside and frequently in danger of getting dirty and wet, it'd be crazy if I didn't wear shorts. I'm just more comfortable in them; I feel more free, unencumbered.

So yesterday, in shorts, I ventured out of the plant section to look for a piece of store equipment I needed. I tried cutting through the paint department in search of it and got rather waylaid between a shopping cart and a couple patrons, one of them an older (somewhere in his 60s, I say) gentleman who eyed me with apparent delight and broke out into song as I struggled to get past him and his cart. "Who wears short shorts?" he sang, an impish grin on his face. "YOU wear short shorts!" I had to literally push my way past him, pushing his shopping cart to give myself a path of escape. He was singing LOUDLY and I was blushing furiously, hoping against hope that none of the store employees were paying any attention. If they were, I don't want to know. I tried to smile weakly at the customer and I may have mumbled something like "No I don't!" as I stumbed my way out of that department. Today, I wore shorts again. Much much longer shorts. I won't give up my shorter shorts, but I thought it was a good day for a break.

Despite that incident, and despite the fact that some store managers were giving me gip today, I still love my job. And I don't suppose mine are any shorter than these. In fact, I know they are not. And I have to wear much less glamourous shoes.


Allison said...

That is the funniest thing I've read so far today, although it is only 6:41 am.
I gave up on short shorts when the cellulite moved in. Goodwill on FPP has massive amounts of shorts, but it was like Rapper's Delight in there yesterday--loud music, loud employees, so be forewarned.

Anonymous said...

I still wear some shorts about the length that you show in the photos, but I learned just last year that I really love skorts - not the kind that look like shorts in the back with a flap in the front, but the kind that looks like a skirt but with shorts sewn in. Much more flattering, but just as comfortable.